A Need and a Question

The Prophet Joseph Smith began his recorded account of the visitation to him of an angel with the following description of a prayer:

In consequence of these things, I often felt condemned for my weakness and imperfections; when, on the evening of the above-mentioned twenty-first of September, after I had retired to my bed for the night, I betook myself to prayer and supplication to Almighty God for forgiveness of all my sins and follies, and also for a manifestation to me, that I might know of my state and standing before him; for I had full confidence in obtaining a divine manifestation, as I previously had one.
--Joseph Smith - History 1:29

Joseph approached God with a need and a question. He knew he needed forgiveness for having given in many times to weakness and temptation. He felt he had not lived up to God's expectations of him following the supernal revelation of the First Vision. He had certainly not lived up to his own expectations. So, his need, acutely felt, was forgiveness. 

I have this same need. I know I do not live up to God's desires for me, and as I strive imperfectly to keep the commandments and my covenants, I am not meeting my own expectations. Whether I recognize and feel godly sorrow for my imperfections is determined by my humility and my attenuation to the Holy Spirit. Because I am serious in my desires for discipleship, my imperfections drive me to prayer.

Joseph's question was about his standing before God. He wanted to know, despite his mistakes, if he was still acceptable to God and if God still wanted to use him. Had he messed up so bad and procrastinated so long that God had turned away from him? Had he lost his chance to build a lasting relationship with God? This was not a passing curiosity. It was not just one of a hundred things Joseph thought about each day. It had become his primary focus, the question that vexed him the most. He needed to know more than anything else if he was lost or still salvageable. 

My quest for faith and spirituality is faltering but sincere. Thus, I am also vexed from time to time with a question similar to Joseph's. For all my efforts and despite all my failures, how am I doing? Am I at least on the right path and leaning in the right direction? Have I made so many mistakes that I am lost? Am I broken beyond repair? Have I made so many wrong turns that I can never reach the goal God set for me in the beginning? Have I wasted my life? That's a tough question for a seventeen-year-old. It is an excruciating question for a sixty-nine-year-old.

One other thing to note about this prayer experience of the young prophet-to-be: unlike his experience in the grove where he was alone and could speak out loud, he was not alone in his attic bedroom with his brothers sleeping peacefully next to him only inches away. He could not pray vocally. He did not say whether he knelt by his bed or simply stretched out under his comfy quilt. Yet his heartfelt, silent prayer penetrated the heavens just as effectively as had his spoken prayer three years earlier.

Joseph showed that the form of prayer is not as important as the content and intention of prayer, supported by faith and confidence in God's ability to hear and answer. Joseph's narration indicated his expectation of an immediate response. He was not being impatient (although what seventeen-year-old has an abundance of patience?), but he felt that an answer would be forthcoming. 

He humbly and sincerely recognized his shortcomings and did not try to hide them. He desired to repent. He understood his need for forgiveness and grace. And he had a legitimate, burning question, the answer to which he was fully committed to obey. He seemingly had no other plan, no alternative strategy, no fallback position. He was willing to be all-in if God still wanted him.

I can pray the same kind of prayer if I put in the same kind of preparation and exercise the same kind of faith. Vocal or silent, alone in a lovely grove or surrounded by a crowd, if my heart is right, if I am humble, if I am willing to confess my faults and truly want to change, if I will accept God's grace and stop trying to save myself, if I bring to God my most burning, fundamental question, and if I cry to Him with the full intention of accepting and obeying whatever His answer for me is—if I am all-in with my faith and hope—God will hear and answer. Immediately. Instantly. Unequivocally. Directly. Unmistakably. And to my total satisfaction. I will know what I need to know. 

It is up to me, then, to act on that knowledge. 

Stronger in Humility

The prophet-author Mormon editorialized on the situation of the Nephites in a period in which the "pride cycle" was spinning faster than usual. The Nephite people had just experienced a brief period of peace and prosperity in which the church of Christ had grown and flourished even to the astounding of the priests and prophets. And now, because of their prosperity, many Nephites were sliding down the slippery slope of pride and persecution. 

A minority, however, remained faithful to the faith. They stayed on the path of righteousness. How did they do it? Mormon tells us, and what he says about the Nephites in their day also applies to us in our day:

Nevertheless they did fast and pray oft, and did wax stronger and stronger in their humility, and firmer and firmer in the faith of Christ, unto the filling their souls with joy and consolation, yea, even to the purifying and the sanctification of their hearts, which sanctification cometh because of their yielding their hearts unto God.
--Helaman 3:35

An interesting choice of words: "stronger in humility." I take this phrase to mean that humility became a more powerful force in the lives of the believers. It became an enabling power. As they became more humble and teachable, they acquired more power from heaven. 

As their humility grew, so did their faith in Christ. It became firm, then solid, then unbendable, then unbreakable. 

Humility and faith go hand in hand. The more humble I am, the more I see the need to depend on God. The more I depend on Him, the more He can help me. The more He helps me, the better I come to know Him. And the better I know him, the more I trust him. Trust is another word for faith. I act with growing confidence in my beliefs. 

The more thoroughly I trust God, and the more evidence I acquire of His love for and interest in me, the more joy I experience. How can one not feel exquisite joy when he recognizes that the Supreme Being in the universe knows him and cares about him?  How can he not rejoice in knowing this earth, life itself, and the grand plan of salvation were created to lift him to exaltation with God? 

Note that I do not purify and sanctify my own heart. I can only yield it to God. It is by His power through Christ's Atonement that my heart is changed. 

The key to this marvelous transformation is prayer and fasting. I start by reaching out to God, even blindly at first, but with hope. Prayer initiates the humbling, refining process in me. Once I make space for God in my life, He can go to work.

Go Down to My House Justified

While Jesus taught His disciples to pray, He did not neglect His detractors, who also needed to learn valuable lessons about proper prayer. He directed the following parable specifically to "certain which trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised others."

Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and the other a publican. The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other men are, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican. I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess. And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner. I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.
--Luke 18:10-14

The Pharisee prayed "with himself". It was almost like he was praying to himself. His prayer was meant to justify and satisfy himself, congratulating himself on his outstanding obedience. The tax collector, on the other hand, was well aware of his faults and sought mercy. 

The Pharisee asked for nothing, assuming his righteousness made him self-sufficient, while the publican pleaded in his humility for God to lift his insufficiency. The only real difference between the worthiness of the two men was the public knowledge of their sins. Each was a sinner in his own right. It was just that the publican's sins were easier to see. The Pharisee hid his sins beneath his robes of piety.

Jesus concluded that the pitiful publican was justified while the haughty Pharisee was not. To be justified in the gospel sense is to have Christ's atonement applied to us, to remove our sins and receive forgiveness. Both men needed forgiveness, but only the publican acknowledged his need and asked for the desired blessing, which was granted him. The Pharisee's pride, on the other hand, blinded him to the very sin for which he most needed justification--pride. His boastful prayer was of no value to him because it availed him nothing. He asked nothing and received nothing in return.

Setting aside the false good of which the Pharisee boasted, how much true good might the Pharisee have been able to do if he had seen himself in the true light? How much better can I become if I allow God to show me who I truly am, faults and weaknesses not withstanding, and then ask for His forgiveness and for the strength to try again?

United Prayer Brings Heavenly Fireworks

Jesus's disciples wanted to know which one of them would be the greatest in heaven. This question prompted the Master to teach a series of parables and precepts about humility, being a responsible shepherd, avoiding evil, and making peace with those who would offend them, ending with an injunction to prayer together in unity:

Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven.
-Matthew 18:19

We strengthen one another through prayer. When we agree on the thing we need and unite our desires, our prayers are additive. They compound one another. Jesus commanded us to be one, unified, and singular in our faith. When we pray together, the unity of faith has a powerful effect. 

God is pleased with righteous unity, and it appeals to His sense of economy when He can answer many prayers with a single action. God wants to bless us, and when we all ask for the same blessing, His power is unleashed in a spectacular display. Like heavenly Fourth of July fireworks, He will dazzle us and awe us with His power. He will not just move the mountain, He will blow it away.

Are you praying for someone who needs a special blessing? Ask others to join you, and then watch the Lord go to work!

Not a Vending Machine

To set the context, Jesus spoke the words quoted below immediately before He gave what we now call the Lord's Prayer: 

Your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him.
-- Matthew 6:8

If God already knows what we need, why did Jesus teach his disciples to pray? Why did Jesus retire often to quiet places to pray? Why does the call to pray permeate the scriptures? What is the point of prayer if God already knows what we need and what we are praying about? 

Prayer is not for God but for us. Make no mistake, I truly believe He knows what we need. We, however, need to remember where our blessings come from. We must not take grace for granted. God is not a vending machine. He wants us to talk to Him, build a relationship with Him, trust Him, and listen to Him. And so, He allows situations and trials to arise in our lives to bring us to Him with our needs and desires, from which we learn humility and gratitude. When we draw closer to our Father, the price is worth it.