Unanswered Prayers

In the Apostle James's open letter to the saints in the primitive Church of his day, he reminded them (and us) why our prayers sometimes go unanswered. 

Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts.
--James 4:3

To ask amiss is to ask for the wrong things. God will not give us things He knows are harmful for us. If a child asks for a bottle of whisky, a wise parent will refuse to give it because of the harm it can do, despite the child's protestations that he thinks it would be fun to get drunk. "No" can be a loving, merciful answer.

In other places we are told to let the Holy Ghost guide our prayers. Without the Spirit's guidance, we may very well pray for things not in harmony with God's will. 

I am grateful the Lord is kind enough to ignore my misguided and self-centered prayers. I am reminded of Garth Brooks's lyric, "thank God for unanswered prayers."

Nothing Wavering

The Apostle James wrote an open letter to the ancient Church in his day with counsel for the saints. Those in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are very familiar with verses 4-5 because they triggered young Joseph Smith to inquire of the Lord and receive the visitation from the Father and the Son that inaugurated the Restoration. We do not as often read verse 6, which contains an important element of effective prayer: 

But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering.
--James 1:6

I may doubt what I know, but I ought not doubt that I can get an answer. I must be firm and unwavering in my desire to receive knowledge. The Lord may pause in His answer to let me feel the need more keenly, so that I may prize the answer more fully when it comes, but He will always answer a sincere request. 

Faith is a belief in things unseen and unknown. I demonstrate my faith when I persist despite the void of evidence that I have been heard. Faith grows as I carry on in what I believe is right even when my efforts seem futile. 

God's primary goal is to increase my faith. In His wisdom and love, that may mean that He must delay His response. "Faith worketh patience," which is a critical virtue. In patience I will find my answers.

Where and Who I Am

The Apostle Paul taught his young apprentice, Timothy: 

I will therefore that men pray every where, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting.
--1 Timothy 2:8

The message is simple—people everywhere should pray. My circumstances and surroundings have no bearing on whether or not I can pray and be heard. My inner circumstances, however, have everything to do with the effectiveness of my prayers. My hands should be holy, meaning my actions should be pleasing to God and in line with His will and doing His work. I should be at peace with those around me, not quarreling and disputing and bickering. The Holy Spirit cannot work on a heart that is full of anger or bitterness. So, where I am when I pray is not the issue, but rather who I am and how I am when we pray.

No Stopping

In Paul's letter to the saints in Thessalonica, the apostle listed in concise terms the way followers of Christ should live. Within his list is found this simple instruction. 

Pray without ceasing.
-- Thessalonians 5:17

It is a mystery to me how one can pray without ceasing, 24x7, and go about normal life. I am a single-minded individual with a one-track mind. Multi-tasking is not an option for me. I can do multi-switching, jumping from one track to another, but I am never on more than one track at a time. Switching, for me, is an inefficient process. I find myself expending more effort changing tracks and picking up the thread where I left off than I do getting the task done on either of the tracks.

I can pray in the gaps, however. Every day includes moments that are not occupied, minutes where I am not engaged in any particular task. Rather than wander in daydreams or look for some nonsense to occupy my thoughts, I can turn my neutral thoughts to prayer. 

For me, praying without ceasing means not giving up on prayer. Answers do not always come the way I want and in the time I want. Nevertheless, I must not stop praying.

The Work of Prayer

In closing his letter to the saints in Colosse, Paul mentioned one of his missionary companions from that city: 

Epaphras, who is one of you, a servant of Christ, saluteth you, always labouring fervently for you in prayers, that ye may stand perfect and complete in all the will of God.
--Colossians 4:12

Prayer done right is work. Effectual prayer entails effort, albeit spiritual effort, but effort none the less. The Book of Mormon prophet Enos "wrestled" before the Lord in his mighty prayer (Enos 1:2) When I read the words that Ether prayed as he asked for help in lighting the barges he had built to cross the ocean to the promised land, I hear him struggle with great effort to beseech God for a blessing. When Jesus knelt with the Nephites to pray with them, He "groaned within himself" as He began his prayer, indicating the tremendous effort He exerted as He prayed for His people.

God approves of work, and He Himself also works. He rested on the seventh day from the work of creation (see Genesis 2:2). Isaiah prophesied God would do a "marvelous work and a wonder" (see Isaiah 29:14), which work and wonder we see today in the Book of Mormon, the restoration of the true Church of Christ, and the gathering of Israel. God works in us and through us (see Ephesians 3:2, Philippians 2:13, Colossians 1:29). He works constantly, and He expects me to work as well.  

Prayer is a good work, but it is nevertheless work.

Open the Door to Closeness

The Apostle Paul counseled the saints in Colosse:

And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him.
--Colossians 3:17

Gratitude is a key element of prayer. It is not just common courtesy. It opens my eyes to all I have already received, reminding me of all God has already done for me, strengthening my faith and increasing my patience. 

The instruction in this verse is to give thanks by Christ, meaning giving thanks from His perspective. In other words, what would Jesus be thankful for in my situation? I learn to see things the way the Savior sees them, which draws me closer to my Father in heaven and to my Savior. 

One of the most important results of prayer is to draw closer to God, and gratitude is the door I open to gain that closeness.

Unlocking the Windows of Heaven

As the Apostle Paul wrapped up his letter to the saints in Philippi, he counseled them:

Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.
--Philippians 4:6

In the popular parlance of today, he might have said, "Let go and let God. Do not be anxious about anything. Just let God know what you need and trust Him to take care of you in His way and in His time. And be thankful in all things. Be grateful for what you have and what you get, always trusting the Lord to give you His best."

According to Paul's instructions, I am to let God know of my requests. In other words, Heavenly Father expects me to ask Him for things. So, what should my prayer requests to the Supreme Being be about? 

Nephi testified, "I know that God will give liberally to him that asketh. Yea, my God will give me, if I ask not amiss" (2 Nephi 4:35). How do I avoid asking "amiss?" Amiss means to be wrong, in appropriate, not quite right. So, how do I ensure that my requests are correct and appropriate so God will give liberally to me?

The answer is personal revelation. When I take the time during prayer to focus my mind and listen to the promptings of the Holy Ghost, God will lay upon my heart the very things for which I should ask. He will tell me exactly what He wants to give me. He will not, however, force His blessings upon me. He waits for me to exercise my agency and request the favors He has prepared for me. When I ask, I turn the key to unlock the windows of heaven through which God can pour out magnificent blessings (see Malachi 3:10).